#I mean yes they speak in the first person but

[froggiequarium]

747 words; some lads fluff of caleb praising u bc i deserve it (n so do u) :x

-

you trudge your way towards the kitchen, hunger evident after spending almost two hours reading and taking the first quiz of the semester, not even a week into the class.

seriously, what was up with that?

you let out a sigh when a voice rings you out of your thoughts.

"hey, pipsqueak!"

you're greeted by the familiar warm voice that makes any leftover tension in your shoulders ease almost instantly.

before you can respond, only being granted enough time to blink up at him, he speaks up again.

"finally droppin' in to say hi?"

you ignore his tease as you close the short distance, arms spreading to embrace him. he immediately welcomes you, one strong arm encircling your waist and easily pulling you towards his side, other hand preoccupied with the food cooking on the stove.

you nuzzle into the warmth of his side, breathing in his comforting scent, closing your eyes to bask in all that is him.

"m' hungry," you whine against the cloth of his shirt.

"is that all you see me as? your personal chef?"

"yes!" you answer playfully and all too quickly.

in the next second, you jolt, feeling a small slap against your ass.

"hey!"

he only laughs in amusement.

"so mean," you pout. "i was studying so hard, and i'm getting punished? how cruel..." you bury your face into his shirt, playfully sulking against him.

he hums, hand sliding up to your head as he pats your hair, other one using the tool in hand to stir the food in the pan.

"what, you want some praise or something?" he teases, not expecting an actual answer.

"yes," you answer maybe just a touch fast, looking up at him expectantly.

your honesty takes him by surprise for just a moment before a grin between teasing and loving crawls up his lips, setting the utensil down to reach over and turn the stove on low, hands now free to fully focus on you.

he looks down into your bright expectant eyes, all his attention on you, and you feel your heart race just a little bit faster in anticipation.

"you did so well, working so hard just a couple of days in," caleb coos at you, petting your head lovingly, nails lightly tracing at your scalp resembling a massage. he loves the way that satisfied grin creeps up your lips as you practically melt against him as you chase his touch, resembling a cat rubbing up against the affection its receiving from its owner.

his large hands slowly slide down the sides of your face before landing on your warm cheeks, almost engulfing them in his hold, squishing them just slightly and gently rubbing them.

"such a good girl, aren't you?"

the way your eyes slip shut and a sound akin to a pleased mewl escaping you as a response is something that makes his heart stutter in his chest.

even after all this time, you're still so cute to him.

"you must be hungry after working so hard, huh?"

you nod in response, hugging him closer, stealing his warmth almost trying to blanket yourself within it. as one of his hands slides down your back to rub gentle circles into it and the other one up to caress your head, you think you'll be able to fall asleep against him like this.

he chuckles warmly, feeling your body slump against him more and more with each passing minute, face buried into his chest. as much as he wants to stay like this, he doesn't want the freshly made lunch to go cold.

he slips his hand from its place on your back moving it to your shoulder, gently shaking you while the other pats your head twice, just slightly firmer than before. his voice comes out hushed in the gentle atmosphere that surrounds the both of you.

"hey, you don't want the food to get cold now, do you?"

you gently shake your head, and his hand— now flat on your head— moves it just enough to make you look back up at him, bleary eyes cracking open to meet his creased sunset ones.

"let me feed my smart baby and then we can nap together, yea? would you like that?"

"mhmm," you hum, giggling when you feel him maneuver your head to make you nod in agreement, almost not giving you a choice (not that you'd ever reject such an offer from caleb).

he smiles at your reaction, eyes dancing with mirth.

"you deserve this, after all. come on," he pats your head one more time, an obvious show of his affection for you for as long as you could remember.

"let's eat now, together."

just as it should be.

-

a/n: i just need some physical affection + some praise from him and i'll be easily fulfilled

-

[iwriteaboutfeminism]

I wanted to talk through some thoughts on the blitz of news that's come out in the last few days.

First, a reminder: It is not physically or intellectually possible to respond to every piece of news or proposed legislation or executive order that's come out recently. Even if it were, that would cause an immobilizing level of overwhelm. And any time you notice yourself feeling immobilized, that's an opportunity to reflect and redirect your focus.

And by "re-directing your focus," I don't mean to ignore all the problems. That's the strategy behind doing a blitz like this, so you don't want to walk right into that trap.

But let's say that you have a lot of strong feelings about a lot of the stuff that's happening or that's being proposed and you place a high value on speaking out and taking action against things you disagree with. All of that comes from a really good place, and I'm not discouraging that impulse.

But in order to do any of that effectively in a time like this, let's talk about the difference between "reaction" and "response."

Imagine you're at a batting cage, ready to work on your swing, but the pitching machine is throwing the balls way too frequently for you to actually get in a good, solid swing for each ball that's being thrown at you. You could try to hold the bat still so that you're bunting, but even if you make contact with more of the balls that way, you're not going to hit them very far.That's one way to think of the difference between reacting and responding.

If you're treating the dozens of new executive orders like a checklist you're going down and marking "against; against; against", yes, it's valuable to speak out against harmful actions, but if you were to fully express yourself on everything that's happening that you find on a spectrum of disagreeable to dangerous, I bet you're already feeling the exhaustion.

The solution isn't to give up, but it's also not to wear yourself out. Instead of reacting, respond.

Back to the batting cage- instead of trying and inevitably failing to swing at each fastball, you need to decide to respond by letting some of the balls fly by you and focusing your effort, skill, time, and attention on hitting the ones you can hit with a strong swing.

While this does require letting most of the balls fly by you, that DOES NOT MEAN that you're allowing those things to go without a strong response. This is because you are acting in community. You are taking the effort, skill, time, and attention required to hit the balls you are hitting SO THAT other people who you are in solidarity with can focus their effort, skill, time, and attention on the balls THEY'RE hitting.

This asks you to determine the difference between issues you can react to and issues you are capable of responding to. Once you've made that decision, there is less pressure and emotional weight on you to play whack-a-mole with each new bit of information. Remember, you're not ignoring or down-playing the importance of or not caring about the other issues (there will always be opportunities for collaboration!) but you are choosing to focus on what you are capable of responding to.

Start with the issue or issues that you have a level of personal experience with or have already spent some time learning about. You don't have to be an expert, but these are the issues you can speak about without having to study a list of talking points first. These are the issues that you know off the top of your head a list of resources or advocacy/activist/mutual aid groups or books/documentaries to recommend to people who are looking to learn and do more.

Start with those, and get in a few good swings. Share experiences with the people and groups who are taking swings at other issues. Learn from each other. Help each other. Take turns resting.

We're playing the long game. Together. And we're going to win.

[nataliescatorccioapologist]

I feel like Taissa is often mischaracterized as cold and/or having no remorse just because she’s ambitious and strong-willed. Her softness and empathy are often overshadowed by her ambition, which is a huge part of her character, but they absolutely shine through when you look closer. She's incredibly goal-oriented and driven, which can make her seem cold or calculating on the surface, but her actions reveal a deep sense of love and care for the people in her life. I really feel like Taissa’s compassion and strong sense of morality are criminally overlooked. In my view, she’s actually one of the most empathetic and remorseful characters on the show.

She is absolutely horrified with herself after she discovers she ate Jackie, so much so that she vomits and screams in despair. After she accidentally breaks Allie’s leg, she’s hanging her head in the locker room in shame and you can hear the remorse in her voice when she swears to Shauna that she didn’t mean to do it.

Tai supports Shauna through her pregnancy in the wilderness and through her affair with Adam (Tai is the first person Shauna tells about both of these things, and Tai passes no judgment, offering only warmth), she risks her own life to save Van from the wolves and doesn’t leave her side as she waits for the group to go get help, she is the only one to show genuine understanding and empathy for Natalie in the adult timeline (“Who does Natalie have?”), she is the one to stop Nat from shooting the blackmailers, and she is so scared of hurting her family that she begs Simone to leave her.

She is just as against Lottie’s leadership and the Wilderness worship as Nat is and she is not afraid to speak up about the dark practices she senses the group is descending into (“She’s not God you guys”). The only reason she eventually joins in Lottie’s circles is because she wants to support Van.

She’s not someone who wears her heart on her sleeve like Natalie, but she expresses her affection through actions: protecting others, making tough decisions, and taking on burdens to keep the group (or her family) afloat. Her empathy is quieter, but it’s always there, and it’s a core part of who she is. She just doesn’t allow herself the vulnerability of fully leaning into that side, because it might feel like a weakness in the face of all the responsibility she carries. It’s easy to misinterpret her actions—like freezing out Allie, forcing Shauna to burn Jackie’s body, or relentlessly pursuing her Senate campaign—as prioritizing ambition over her friends and family, but in her mind, she’s doing it for the people she loves, to create a better future for them. Her intentions are rooted in love, even if they don’t always land the way she hopes.

Does she do some really, really fucked up things sometimes? Yes, definitely. But so does every single character on this show, that’s the point. They all have some degree of kindness and compassion within them (yes, even Misty), but none of them know how to show it in a healthy way. Taissa’s way of showing love may be a bit gruff and stoic on the surface, but underneath you can tell how much she cares about the people around her and is absolutely terrified of hurting them.

[guess-my-next-obsession]

endure & survive | iii. close call

pairing: post-outbreak!joel miller x single mother!reader

chapter content: MINORS DNI, written in dual POV/first person POV, no description/name given to reader, reader is a single mother, age gap (twenty-ish years), gun talk/threats, violence, threats of SA (not from joel or reader), descriptions of blood, death (no main characters)

word count: 3.4k

series masterlist | previous chapter

READER 

I wake to the sound of a dull thump outside and a colder bed than I’m used to. My eyes bolt open as I reach for my son beside me, only for my hand to land against the mattress. I waste no time in getting to my feet, my boots stomping across the rickety floor until I’m opening the bathroom door, but he’s not there either.  

Shit. 

At the sound of laughter coming from outside the cabin, I whip the front door open and take in the sight of Colt and Ellie tossing snowballs at one another from their respective snow forts on either side of the lawn. I want to feel relieved, want to feel happy that he’s having fun and being a kid in a way he doesn’t always get to be, but I’m too protective and paranoid to feel anything but anger.  

“Colt!” I shout, not violently but loud enough for him to know I mean business. Never in his life has he left the cabin without me. I don’t know what’s come over him.  

I watch as Colt attempts to hide behind the mound of snow in front of him, as if we hadn’t just made eye contact from across the yard.  

“Colt, I’m giving you to the count of three. One...two...thr—” 

“Fine!” he shouts, popping his head over the mound as he stands and stomps his way across the snow to the edge of the porch.  

“What do you think you’re doing out here?” I scold, scanning the yard for any sign of Joel. Not that I trust the guy to watch over my kid. I find him on the side of the cabin, chopping wood with the rusty old axe I’ve been neglecting this winter.  

“We were just playing,” Colt pouts, kicking his boots into the snow. “I heard Ellie outside when I was sleeping and wanted to come out and see what they were doing. I knew you’d say no if I woke you up, so I just—” 

“Decided you’d give yourself permission?” I ask, crossing my arms over my chest. He looks so damn adorable and innocent peering up at me with his father’s eyes that I can’t help but soften a bit. Reaching a hand out, I cup his cheek and give it a gentle brush of my thumb. “Babe, that’s not how this works. I don’t say no just to be mean. I want you safe, so when I tell you you can’t do something, trust that it’s for a good reason.” 

His only response is a mumbled, “Okay.” 

“And FYI, I wouldn’t have said no,” I add with a half-smile. “I might’ve been grumpy about having to get up and come out here with you, but I wouldn’t have said no.” 

“So…I can keep playing?” he asks, his eyes brightening along with the smile that stretches across his face.  

“Yes,” I sigh, folding my hand back against my chest. “I have to speak with Joel, anyways.” 

Colt doesn’t seem to give much of a shit about what’s on my to-do list this morning as he bolts back to his fort and shouts that the fight is back on to Ellie.  

Stomping my way down the porch, snow crunches beneath my boots as I make my way to where Joel’s standing, chopping wood. “I’d appreciate if you made sure Colt had my permission before letting him come out here.” 

Joel pauses what he’s doing and turns to stare at me with furrowed brows and a blank look in his eyes. “It’s not my job to watch over your kid.” 

“No, but any decent human being would double check that a kid’s parent knows where they’re at,” I counter, staring back at him just as gruffly.  

“He said you knew. Not my fault he lied.” 

“You’re a dick, you know that?”  

“Been told a few times,” he says, turning back to the log in front of him and raising his axe in the air to strike at it. I don’t flinch when the wood splits in two, even if he hit it a bit more forcefully than was necessary. “We done here?” 

“You’re—” Rude. Callous. Arrogant. Unfortunately good looking. A nightmare cocktail of traits. I settle on keeping it simple, though. “An asshole.” 

“And you’re fuckin’ naive if you think that kid’s going to be safe out here forever,” he counters, loading up another log without missing a beat. “Ever heard the story of Rupunzel? Keepin’ him locked away in your cabin isn’t gonna teach him a thing about survival.” 

“Oh, I guess I should be putting a gun in his hands and taking him out for target practice, then?” I step closer, fueled by the wild desire to yank that axe out of his grasp and chop him down with it. For civility’s sake, I restrain myself from doing just that. “You have no idea what it’s like to be a kid and have to do the kinds of things it takes to survive out here—how it fucks up the mind. I do. And as long as I have a shot at preserving his youth, protecting his innocence, I’m going to do all that I can to keep him away from all the shit that’s turned people like you into cold, unfeeling assholes.” 

Joel’s only response is a scoff, a humorless smirk, and a strike of the axe through the log in front of him. When it becomes clear that he has no interest in continuing our argument—I'm clueless as to why I wish he did—I turn on my feet and head back to the porch to stew and watch over my apparently hopeless son. He’s still playing with Ellie, but instead of throwing snowballs at each other, they’ve moved on to building a snowman. Colt’s giggling and smiling like I’ve never seen before, and the sound is healing.  

I don’t give a shit what Joel has to say about my parenting. Colt is happy and safe, and at six years old, that’s all he needs to be.  

JOEL 

I’m not used to feeling remorse. It’s been years since I’ve been forced to tap into these sickly kinds of feelings—dangerous feelings. But that kid is turning me soft.  

It’s the only explanation for why I’m standing here scolding myself for being such an ass to our host. I hadn’t meant to attack her parenting skills. I remember how it felt to be judged and scrutinized for the way I chose to raise Sarah by myself rather than make it work with her mother. I remember how hard it was to do it alone, how every decision I made felt like it would end up changing her life.  

So, why the fuck was I coming at her like that?  

Maybe it’s the way she’s so unflinching in approaching me. Even with an axe in my hand—a stranger’s hand—she strolled right up to me and let me have it. Her fearlessness made me feel a little defensive, as if subconsciously I knew who would come out as the victor if we were to go at it. I might know how to fight, might have hands made for survival, but she’s got something I’ve lost long ago.  

She’s got something to fight for.  

Ellie’s the closest thing I’ve come to that in a long fucking time. But it’s not the same when I know she’s capable of fighting, too.  

That little boy out in the yard hasn’t seen a fight in his life, and it needs to stay that way.  

“Still taking your old man frustrations out on these logs?” Ellie’s voice is a welcomed interruption from my thoughts. She’s covered in snow from head to toe, but she hasn’t looked more like I kid in all the time I’ve known her.  

“Somethin’ like that,” I reply, swinging the axe into the stump and lodging it there before turning to face her. “Probably got until this evenin’ to get settled before the storm rolls in. Just tryin’ to make sure everybody’s got enough wood.” 

“Thoughtful,” Ellie says, though judging by the look she shoots towards the yard where Colt and his mother are making snow angels, she wants to say more. 

“Out with it,” I sigh, propping a hand on my hip.  

“Do you have to be such a dick? I mean, I don’t expect you to be Mr. Friendly all of a sudden, but she is kind of going out of her way so that we don’t freeze to death out here.” 

“I’m not doin’ it on purpose,” I admit with a shrug and a shake of my head. “Just not used to actin’ any different.” 

“Well get used to it, please. Or at least learn how to act like you’re civilized. We’re only here for a couple more days. I’d really appreciate if we—” 

Silencing herself, Ellie whips her head over to the tree line behind the shed, her eyebrows narrowed. I turn that way, too, even if whatever she heard went completely missed by my shitty hearing.  

“What?” I manage, keeping my voice a whisper. Slowly, she inches towards the shed, opening the door and grabbing the pistol out of her backpack before tipping her head towards the cabin in a silent demand that I follow her.  

Grabbing the axe out of the tree stump, I make my way over to the porch and wait for her to fill me in on what kind of threat we’re dealing with this time. Our host and her son seem to be aware of the noise as well, the two of them joining us in eerie silence.  

“You wanna tell me what the fuck’s goin’ on?” I whisper to Ellie, keeping my voice deadly silent.  

“You can’t hear?” Our host asks, her face scrunched up like she was disgusted by something.  

“Old guy’s a little hard of hearing,” Ellie says dismissively. “It’s a group of dudes. Just beyond the trees.” 

“There’s a clearing thirty or so yards that way. They’re probably waiting there,” our host says, her gaze lingering on mine for a beat before falling to her son. “Listen to me, baby. I need you to go inside, lock yourself in the bathroom, and don’t come out until I tell you it’s okay. Do you understand?” 

“What’s going on, mama?” Long gone is the happy kid that was playing in the snow with Ellie. Now, he’s just a ball of fear.  

“We’ve just gotta go check something out, okay?”  

“No,” he whines, latching onto her leg as she tries to usher him into the cabin. “I don’t want to be alone.” 

I look over at Ellie, catching her frowning at the boy. I know she likes to be involved in the chaos, but right now, I think there’s a better job for her. “Stay with the kid.” 

“What?” Ellie whips her eyes to mine. “But I—” 

“You’ve got a gun,” I whisper. “If anything happens to us, you’ll be able to protect the two of you.” 

She only looks like she’s about to argue for a second before Colt’s hands find her arm. Ellie melts a little as he clings to her the way he was clinging to his mother just seconds before, and with a sigh, she gives me a solitary nod. “Be careful. Both of you.” 

READER 

With weapons in hand—a shotgun in mine, an axe in Joel’s—we make our way through the snow as silently as we can. There’s no telling if this group means us any harm, but with them this close to discovering my safe haven, I can’t take any chances.  

It’s one of the uglier truths that come along with this new world, but only one side is walking away from this fight today. Joel and I, however at odds, have to protect ours. At whatever cost. 

As we’re nearing the clearing, the voices Ellie and I had heard earlier grow louder, causing Joel and I to glance at each other. He tips his chin towards the large pine tree beside me, a silent request that I hide myself behind it, and moves over to one nearer to him.  

“It’s a whole little family they’ve got over there,” a man says, his accent distinctly southern. It’s not like Joel’s subtle drawl; this guy sounds like he’s straight out of Deliverance. “Should be easy enough, once we get rid of the dad.” 

I glance at Joel, finding his jaw ticking and fingers gripping his axe tighter. I haven’t been particularly afraid of him in the twenty-four hours I’ve known him, but now I can see why he’s lasted so long out here. Take the kid away, give him a weapon, make a threat, and he turns into murder incarnate right in front of your eyes. It’s as terrifying as it is attractive.  

Maybe that says more about me than I realize. 

“I say we kill the dad, then the kids, then we have some fun with the mom before takin’ her out too,” the same man continues, and my stomach sinks. Not just because of what they plan on doing to me, but the thought of them coming anywhere near Colt and Ellie.  

Not on my fucking watch.  

Joel’s eyes meet mine and he gives me a subtle shake if his head. A silent promise that I can’t help but believe he’ll keep.  

“We gotta be smart, now,” another, older voice chimes in, sounding like the crackling of a fire. Clearly, this one’s the leader of the bunch. “We don’t know if they got guns. All we got is our knives. We need to wait until it’s dark out and they’re asleep to do anythin’.”  

Fucking cowards. And idiots. Now that I know I’m walking into a knife fight with a twelve-gauge, that sick feeling from before is long gone.  

Joel catches my attention, mouthing, “How many?” 

I peek around the tree and squint, spotting three men huddled around a small fire. There’s the oldest one, and then there are two identical looking men, save for the hundred pound difference in one of them. In another world, they’d look like a father and his twin sons on a camping retreat. In this world, though, they’re just three sick fucks looking to kill and pillage.  

I turn back to Joel and hold up three fingers, earning a solitary nod.  

“You got a clean shot?” he mouths, and I line up my scope to check it out.  

The eldest is up and pacing around now, stroking his beard while the twins sit there and watch. I can’t get a clean shot on him, but the younger ones are doable from the ten or so yards separating us.  

But the second I pull the trigger, they ones I don’t hit are going to be up and running.  

I give Joel a nod, keeping my gun lifted just like Kit taught me all those years ago. A skill I never wanted to be taught, but one I’m thankful thankful to have now that he’s gone. Joel raises his hand, counting down from five with his fingers before giving me the go ahead to shoot.  

And the minute I do, shit turns to chaos.  

JOEL 

I hardly have the chance to breathe before I’m being grabbed from behind, an arm handed around my throat threatening to suffocate me.  

There must’ve been another member of their group that we hadn’t seen, one waiting in the trees just in case. But judging by the shouts and slurs being hurled out into the air, I’m guessing that my new companion—or whatever the hell she is—has decent aim. Hell, she might’ve even taken him out in one shot.  

“Joel,” she gasps, her attention torn between the men we were watching and the one trying to wrestle me to the ground. But I don’t want her focus, not when she’s still got two men to handle. I’ll be able to fight this one off myself.  

“Shoot,” I choke out, kicking my boot backwards into the shin of my attacker.  

“Fuck,” he hisses, his grip loosening just enough for me to shove out of his hold. Facing him, I raise my axe and swipe at his legs, slicing the back of his knee. He shouts as he goes down onto one knee, calling out for his friends. “Fuck! Brady! Two out here!” 

A shot sounds, the bullet whizzing through the air.  

Then another.  

And another.  

Still, there are two voices hurling promises of pain and misery.  

She’s getting nervous now, her aim sloppy. I’m not looking at her, not as I strike clean through the man in front of me’s neck, cutting his head off in one harsh blow.  

It’s sickening—the sight, the blood, the feeling of tearing through flesh. But it’s either kill or be killed. And they plan to do a hell of a lot worse than kill my new companion.  

“Joel!” This time, her voice isn’t laced with concern for me. No, she’s scared for herself. And as I whip around to see why, I feel my stomach drop with dread.  

A man at least three times her size is rushing at her like a linebacker, ready to take her out.  

To take her away from her son.  

From me.  

Fuck that.  

I charge at him like a bull, hitting him from the side right before he runs right through her. She drops her gun in the process of scrambling back, her eyes wide as she watches me straddle him, my fists pounding his face into the snow until he no longer looks human.  

“Get the fucking gun!” I shout, still fighting off the hands trying to clasp around my neck. I hear her scramble to the gun, but not before the final intruder—the oldest one—stomps his foot into the barrel. Right as I deliver the final blow to his friend’s skull.  

“Y’all thought it was okay to kill my boys?” His voice is pure evil, pure grit. If I were a bit more hillbilly, it might’ve sounded like me. “You got any idea what I’m gonna do to y’all to pay you back? Startin’ with you, sugar.”  

I’m panting and sore, my knuckles bloodied and teeth bared as I watch him kick her chest with enough force to break a rib. She lands against the soft snow and coughs up some blood, but her eyes don’t flicker with pain. No, they’re alight with fire. Promises of sweet vengeance.  

“I’ll leave him alive long enough for him to watch what I’m about to do to you,” the old man says, lifting the gun and slinging the strap over his shoulder before turning to me. “You think you’ll like that? Watchin’ me play with your toy?” 

“You lay a hand on her and I’ll take my sweet time in killin’ you,” I promise, spitting out a mouthful of blood, the crimson staining the pure snow.  

“How you plannin’ on doin’ that when you’re dead?” he chuckles, turning back to her. “That’s a real gentleman you got there. Too bad he can’t save you.” 

“No, but I fucking can.”  

Ellie.  

Fuck me, she shouldn’t be out here.  

And neither should the six year old at her side, holding a kitchen knife.  

Just as the old man opens his mouth to speak, Ellie shuts him up by putting a bullet through his forehead. Just like I taught her.  

“Shit.” Ellie’s shaking, her eyes fixed on the man she just killed as he falls the the ground, along side two of his dead companions, the other somewhere in the clearing alone. “Shit. Joel.” 

“I know,” I blurt out, rushing over to her and blocking both her and Colt’s view of the bodies. His mom gets onto her feet, stumbling and gripping her chest as she reaches her son.  

“Mama,” he cries, dropping the knife in the snow as he clings to her.  

And fuck me if the sight doesn’t make my chest ache.  

“C’mon,” I say, scanning the woods around us to make sure there aren’t any more surprises in store. “Into the cabin. Let’s go.” 

[notdotspot]

Dp x Dc We Meet Again

Masterpost

Tim was waiting impatiently in his normal corner of the Bat Burger. He finds it difficult to sit still when he is so close to clues about his dreams. Despite his anger at Bruce for benching him, the ten hours of sleep did grant him reprieve from his visions. He thought sleeping would have reawoken the nightmares, but Tim had dreamless sleep for the first time in years. In retrospect, he does not even have clear memories past the forty-eight-hour mark, so his research after that time was nothing but jumbled thoughts. At least now he is not plagued with paranoia and that creature lurking in the outskirts of his vision. He could take the chance to get some fuel in his body, though Damian would argue a burger and fries are not sufficient nutrients for their nighttime activities, and put his rest towards quality investigation. 

The door chimed as new customers walked in. Tim glanced up to see Jason walking towards him. Tim would have directed his attention back to his food if he had not noticed Jason speaking to someone behind them. Leading the mystery person to the table where he was sitting. 

“Trust me he is chill. He might actually be able to help.” Jason’s attention turns to Tim. “I brought someone for you to meet. I do not think he is working for Ras but I think he knows something about the Lazarus Pits.”

“Hi, I am Phantom,” says a boy as he pops out from behind Jason.

Tim freezes the second their eyes meet. Those green eyes sent him right back to the clearing he found himself in four nights ago. The black figure whose whole being radiated fear and death. A glowing green aura and eyes to match. Eyes he has seen a thousand times since his dream. Eyes that were burned onto the back of his eyelids. Eyes that he thought he escaped after sleeping off his exhaustion. Eyes he had nearly chalked up to being a fictional dream and a symptom of delirium. 

He squeezes his eyes shut, but the darkness does not cover the blazing green of those eyes. His ears are ringing and his heart is pounding out of his chest. A firm hand grips his shoulder and his eyes spring open, meeting Jason's clear blue eyes. 

Tim finally registers his voice, “Hey, Timmy! Are you good?”

A voice off to the side speaks quietly, “Is he okay? Should I  leave?”

“No!” Tim forces out, quickly. “Stay. I need answers.”

The boy, Phantom he remembers, hesitantly slides into the booth.

“I can try.”

“What are you?” Tim asks with a bit too much aggression. Jason smacks him on the back of the head. 

“Do not be rude, dipshit. He is willing to help and he does not seem like a threat.”

“Were you not just chasing him through the city earlier?” Tim accuses.

Phantom interrupts, “Yes, but it was all fun and games. I try not to interfere with human realms.”

“So, you are not human?” Tim’s scrutinizing gaze tears through him. Jason goes to slap him again but Tim catches his hand, giving him a dirty look.

“Be nice.”

Tim raises his hands in surrender but his guarded posture remains. “Okay. Okay. Can you, please, queue us in on your existence?” 

“Sure! I am a ghost from a different realm,” he says, casually, “It can not be that crazy. You have a Kryptonian on your planet and he is a ghost, too.” Phantom points at Jason.

“I mean, well, kind of. Not in the same way that I am but he reeks of tainted ectoplasmic residue. He has seen death. I can feel it.” 

“What? I am a ghost?”

Phantom turns to Jason. “Not quite. It is like the difference between fish and aquatic mammals. Ghosts, or for the sake of this analogy fish, survive within water. They rely on it for habitat and food sources, but they also breathe it. You are like an aquatic mammal, you seem to also rely on the water, or ectoplasm, for survival, but you do not breathe it. If my inference is right, you require your human functions to be alive but without ectoplasmic energy, you would unravel. You would be like a beached whale, still alive, but slowly shutting down without water. There is likely a more scientific approach but no way to know for sure without a lab.”

“Cool.” Jason stands from his spot. “Good enough for me. I am getting food. Your usual, Tim?”

“Sure,” Tim says blankly, eyes never leaving Phantom. 

“Anything for you, kid?”

“Not a kid, but I will take a number three. Thank you.” Jason walks around the corner to place the order. Tim’s eyes harden.

“My turn. Why are you haunting me?”

“I am not. Haunting is not a real thing. Just some GIW propaganda to make people subconsciously fear ghosts. A haunt is a ghost’s safe space and a term stolen and twisted by humans,” he replies, cooly. There is a tinge of bitterness in his voice.

“Okay, so why did I see you in my dreams? What is the GIW?”

“The GIW stands for Guys in White. Some secret government organization under the guise of public security. They research and hunt ghosts. To the dream question, I do not know, but I am flattered.”

“I am serious. Night terror level dreams.”

Phantom seemed to soften. “Look, I really do not know. Maybe you had a recent brush with death. Sometimes close encounters wear down the line between our realms. I am sorry. They will go away with time.”

Jason slams the food tray down, sliding into the booth next to Tim. 

“Thank you, uhh?”

“Red Hood,” Tim answers for him, seeing as Jason had already slid back his helmet for a bite of burger. 

“I am Tim.”

They eat silently as Tim and Phantom’s eyes flicker back and forth. Jason finishes quickly, and with his helmet back in place, turns to Phantom.

“So, is the Lazuras Pit ectoplastic?”

“Ectoplasm? Umm. Do you have a picture?”

Tim wipes his hands and grabs his phone. He takes a moment to scroll and type before turning the screen, displaying a picture of a glowing green pit.

“Oh. One hundred percent ectoplasm.”

“Is there a way to fix me? Should I swim in it again?”

“Again? No. You never should have in the first place. It looks dirty. I can infuse you with fresh ectoplasm. With the right amount, it should last you about the same time as a normal human lifespan. I would need a few days to do the calculations and maybe consult some colleagues.” 

“Colleagues?” Jason questions.

“People I know. They would know more than me about ectoplasm specifics. I will make the trip soon.” 

Tim speaks up, having tucked his phone away, “Could you get rid of the Lazarus Pit?”

“I think so. It would need some purification but, theoretically, I could send it back to the ghost zone.”

Tim turns to Jason, “I think you need to brief B. We could solve more than one issue with Phantom’s help.”

Phantom’s phone begins to ring. He pulls it from a pocket that was definitely not there before.

“I have to take this. Thank you for the meal.” He exits the booth, answering the phone. 

“Hey, Frostbite. Perfect timing! I have some questions for you.”

As Phantom neared the door, already engrossed in his conversation, Tim calls out, “How will we contact you?”

“I will find you!”

-----------

Linked the master post bc I am lazy and don't want to link each part individually

I can't stop writing. I am about to get busy with personal work, so updates may slow down. I was posting a chapter a day but I don't know if I can keep up with that as this story gets longer. I will try to find a schedule quickly!

Thank you for reading!

[jadewithaj]

You people and your conviction that you know anything about people you have never met… be it Zverev or someone else. Or that feminism means that, sooner or later, all men are bad and no woman ever lies, because her life turned out differently from what she hoping it to be.

Can’t wait till your fave will end up accused of something dreadful. You’ll surprise yourself how quickly that moral superiority of yours will do a 180 turnaround 🙃

Wow, “your people”, anon what kind of person do you I am? Because you also seems to be full of conviction despite not knowing me at all🤭

Also thank you for thinking about me and my faves. But if you think this is my first year being a sport fan or a fan of anyone in general to the point that I’ve never been disappointed by anyone…damn, I wish!!!

Don’t worry, my moral superiority complex is still very much intact. Because right now, it’s Zverev who had TWO domestic violence lawsuits on his resume, not mine🫢

And yes, if any person I currently like have an accusation of this caliber. I WILL do a 180 and immediately unstan. Because first and foremost, I KNOW human are capable of doing terrible things. Yes, I would always give the victims my benefits of the doubt, because the last thing I’ll do is to not take a lawsuit seriously.

Last but not least, the fact that you rather believe that these two women, one of them had Zverev’s child, were both gold diggers and are terrible people who only goes after his money; than to think that a rich and powerful man is capable of doing terrible things and is capable of getting away with it. That, that alone, speaks more volume about your moral standing than it ever speaks about mine.

So anon, what an odd thing to say🤨

[anonymousewrites]

Lavender for Royalty; Sage for Wisdom (Book 1) Chapter Fifteen

Kyoya Ootori x Reader

Chapter Fifteen: Gardenia for Secret Love

Summary: The Host Club needs to fix (Y/N) and Kyoya's friendship, stat!

            “(Y/N), do you want to come with us to tail Hikaru and Haruhi on their date? It will be fun!” said Tamaki, smiling at (Y/N).

            They looked at him from where they sat reading and glared. “No.”

            “…You’re still mad at Kyoya,” said Tamaki, wincing.

            “I’m a host, not his servant. He doesn’t get to order me around,” said (Y/N).

            “You know Kyoya didn’t mean it like that,” said Tamaki, coming in and sitting down next to (Y/N).

            “Really? It sure seemed like he does, and Kyoya says what he means,” said (Y/N).

            “Yeah, but, come on, Kyoya would never really order you around,” said Tamaki. He smiled at (Y/N). “You’re friends, remember?”

            “He still did. I’m a host who can get told how they spend their time, apparently,” said (Y/N).

            Tamaki looked at their face and saw their anger shift slightly. Sadness shown through their expression, instead. “Kyoya respects you. He just…wants you to not leave us.” It was as much explanation as Tamaki could give.

            “I wasn’t going to. I’m still not going to,” said (Y/N). “I wasn’t even considering going out with Tooru.” They put their book down and crossed their arms. “But Kyoya just…He acted so condescending.”

            “I think you two need to try to communicate,” said Tamaki. He nudged their shoulder. “Kyoya can explain that he just got a bit protective—” (jealous) “—and you can say you weren’t planning on saying yes. Then you two will be alright.”

            (Y/N) deadpanned as they looked at Tamaki. “Are…Are you trying to explain to me how to properly communicate feelings?”

            Tamaki posed. “I am the king the of the Host Club.”

            “…Right.” (Y/N) chuckled slightly. He was an idiot, but at least he was well-intentioned. “Fine. I’ll talk to him—”

            “Oh, good, we reserved a table at a restaurant in town for you two for lunch!” said Tamaki.

            “Are you going to follow us?” said (Y/N), raising a brow.

            “No, we have to follow Hikaru and Haruhi. And Kyoya would yell at me…” Tamaki pouted. However, he wasn’t down for long and quickly perked up again. “But once you guys all talk, then we’ll all be okay and be able to spend the rest of our week having fun!” He grabbed (Y/N)’s hand and dragged them up. “Now come on!”

l

            (Y/N) took a deep breath and squared their shoulders. Then, they pushed open the door of the restaurant and walked straight to the table where Kyoya—punctual as ever—already sat at. Silently, (Y/N) sat down across from him. They both glanced up, made eyed contact, and looked back down at the menus in front of them.

            How do I start the conversation? I shouldn’t have to. He was the one who made this into an argument. I was going to say no. Besides, I can date if I want to. The only person I want to date is him, but still… (Y/N) kept their eyes glued to the menu

            They aren’t speaking to me. Very well. They should have known that hosts can’t—shouldn’t—date. It would distract them. Besides, someone like Tooru who barely knows them doesn’t deserve them. They deserve someone who knows them and would treat them well. Kyoya held the menu tightly. Like me. I was quite…forward in my interruption of Tooru, but I maintain he doesn’t deserve them.

            “Can I take your orders?” A waiter appeared beside them.

            Kyoya and (Y/N) looked up, and without looking at one another, they ordered. Silence descended over them once again when the waiter. Both Kyoya and (Y/N) were too stubborn to be the first to speak, and so the silence continued awkwardly even as their food was brought to them and as they began to eat.

            Finally, after a torturous hour of silence—wow were they obstinate—Kyoya looked up from his food. (Y/N) was usually quite open and spoke to him readily, and, as much as he hated to admit it, the lack of their voice was frustrating (actually, it made him sad, but Kyoya wasn’t ready to admit that he had more emotions that satisfaction and annoyance).

            “Tamaki wants us to talk,” said Kyoya.

            (Y/N) raised their eyes and looked at him. “Okay. Talk.”

            “I have to, first?” said Kyoya. “I did nothing wrong—”

            “You tried to order me around like I’m not your equal,” said (Y/N). “I thought we were past that.”

            Kyoya paused. That was how it had come across? Of course it had. (Y/N) had no idea that he respected them more than he did most people—in fact, more than every other person he knew. “That…isn’t what I intended.”

            “Enlighten me, then. Don’t say you interrupted Tooru because I’m a host,” said (Y/N). “I know that had nothing to do with it. I’m not stupid, Kyoya.”

            “You’re not,” said Kyoya. “I would never imply you are.”

            “Then why did you interrupt Tooru?” said (Y/N). “I was going to say no.”

            Kyoya was quiet for a moment, and (Y/N) patiently waited for him to speak. They could see this silence was not stubbornness, it was Kyoya deciding on how to phrase his thoughts (in this particular case, he was figuring out how to not confess to (Y/N) on the spot.

            “He…does not deserve you,” said Kyoya. He looked at (Y/N). “You deserve someone who knows you and can give you the world.”

            (Y/N)’s heart felt like a drum in their chest as they gazed at Kyoya. “So you were…”

            Don’t say jealous. If Kyoya was so transparent, he might have rethink his entire sense of self.

            “Protective,” finished (Y/N).

            “…Yes,” said Kyoya.

            “Kyoya.” (Y/N) smiled slightly and put their hand out. They touched his, and he looked down at their hand covering his own. “You don’t need to protect me. I know you worry—” the incident on the beach had proved that “—but I know what I’m looking for in a relationship.” You. And you fill the requirements you’ve set. (Y/N) smiled. “And I was going to say no, clearly. I don’t know Tooru. Let me give my thoughts first. If you have concerns, you can bring them up to me later. Okay?”

            Kyoya looked at them. He didn’t want to say yes. He didn’t like watching people flirt with (Y/N) without knowing if they’d say yes or not to going out. He’d much rather handle everything himself so that he didn’t have to be jealous. But… “Very well.” Kyoya respected (Y/N) too much to say no. “I overstepped. I apologize.”

            (Y/N) smiled. “And I apologize for shutting you out. We should’ve talked it out earlier.” They tilted their head.  “So, are we alright?”

            Kyoya’s hand turned over where (Y/N)’s covered his. He took their hand gently. “Of course.”

            (Y/N) smiled, and their cheeks warmed. “Good. Good.”

            And for a moment, they sat there together, just gazing at one another’s eyes with their hands intertwined. This was…perfect. This was what every day should be, just them, together and comfortable as if they were the only people in the world.

            If I could have these moments with them forever, I would be happy. I lo—

            Just sitting with him is nice. If this moment lasted forever, I would never tire of it. I lo—

            As soon as those thoughts entered their minds, (Y/N) and Kyoya pulled their hands back. They were both composed individuals, but neither was able to keep calm with such flustering thoughts in their mind. (Y/N) smiled slightly at Kyoya, though, before looking back at their food. Kyoya smiled to himself.

            They were no longer fighting. Everything was right in the world once more.

l

            “Ah. It’s raining,” said Kyoya when he and (Y/N) had finished, paid (he’d paid) for their meals, and stepped out to head back to the pensione.

            “I hope Haruhi is alright,” said (Y/N) as thunder crashed. “She is afraid of thunder…”

            “Hikaru should be with her,” said Kyoya. “They’re on a ‘date’ to get them to get along again.” He nodded. “My car is here. We can head back and check on her from there. Due to the rain, they’ll cut their date short.”

            “Alright,” said (Y/N), nodding. Still, they glanced up at the stormy clouds with worry.

l

            “Hikaru and Haruhi aren’t back yet?” said (Y/N) as they entered the pensione and didn’t see the pair.

            “You two are together!” Tamaki smiled. “Your talk worked!”

            “Do not think your interference was the reason,” said Kyoya. “We would have talked tings over with or without you.”

            Tamaki pouted, but Kyoya didn’t looked at him. He wasn’t letting Tamaki’s ego grow bigger than it already was.

            “Hikaru is calling,” said Kaoru, answering the ringing phone. “Hey, Hikaru?” A pause. “Eh? Are you coming home by foot? What about Haruhi?” He sighed. “You argued again and split up?”

            Tamaki’s eyes widened, and he grabbed the phone. “You got in a fight and left?! Hikaru! You didn’t see her get in the car, did you? If not, go back!” Clearly, Hikaru was putting up a huff. “Go back and find Haruhi. You jerk! Go back right now! How dare you leave a girl behind in the rain! Before you throw a fit like some jealous brat, think about how others might feel! Haruhi is afraid of thunder!”

            (Y/N) and Kyoya exchanged a surprise look. Tamaki’s truer feelings had come through in a surprisingly mature manner.

            “Kyoya, we’re using your car to find Haruhi and Hikaru!” said Tamaki. “Let’s go!”

            “Hikaru will call me when he finds her,” said Kaoru, nodding.

            And, soon enough, they did find her. Hikaru had tracked her to a church and sat with her while the thunderstorm raged. He hugged her while she shivered, showing a level of maturity he had not yet shown. Tamaki smiled and helped carry an emotionally-exhausted Haruhi to the car. As (Y/N) watched, they tilted their head. Perhaps he hadn’t realized his true feelings, but…something was happening.

            “You meant for Hikaru to learn some compassion on that date,” said Kyoya to Kaoru as they watched Hikaru and Tamaki with Haruhi. “Did you think about the possibility that he might fall in love.”

            “Oh, that,” said Kaoru. “That won’t happen yet. After all, Hikaru is still an idiot.”

            “Like Tamaki,” said Kyoya, nodding.

            Like you and (Y/N), thought Kaoru, glancing at Kyoya as he gazed at (Y/N).

l

            “I shouldn’t have been so rude to you,” said Hikaru, not looking Arai in the eyes. He bowed. “I apologize.”

            Arai smiled. “Don’t worry. I understand.” His smile softened. “I’m glad Haruhi has friends who care about her.”

            Behind them, the group was enjoying a summer festival at Karuizawa. Hikaru and Arai looked over at where Haruhi was showing an excited Tamaki all the games. She glanced up and smiled.

            “We’re lucky to have her, I think,” said Hikaru, smiling slightly.

            “(Y/N), you’re here,” said Honey, grinning.

            “Sorry I was late. I wanted to check out some of the bookshops,” said (Y/N).

            Kyoya looked up and had to catch his breath for a moment. They wore a familiar denim jumpsuit.

            “That’s a nice outfit, senpai,” said Haruhi.

            “Thanks,” said (Y/N), smiling. “It was a gift.” They glanced at Kyoya and made eye-contact, smile softening. “I really like it.”

            “Haruhi, my net broke,” pouted Tamaki.

            Haruhi sighed. “I’ll show you again how to play.”

            (Y/N) chuckled and walked away to join Kyoya. “Thank you.” They had found the package waiting on their bed with a card reading, “I’m sorry” in familiar handwriting. “You didn’t have to buy it.”

            “You look happy,” said Kyoya. That was enough for him. “You deserve it.” They deserve the world.

            (Y/N) smiled. “As long as this isn’t a scam to get me to pay you back,” they chuckled.

            “You don’t have to pay me back,” said Kyoya. Their presence was enough.

            (Y/N)’s lips parted in surprise. Kyoya, not focusing on money? Inconceivable. Inconceivable but…flattering.

            “Haruhi, dance with me!” said Honey, grabbing Haruhi and pulling her over to wear music was playing.

            “Fly Me to the Moon” by Frank Sinatra was playing, and several couples were dancing. Honey was jumping around while holding Haruhi’s hands excitedly. Tamaki pouted at seeing her dance with someone else, but the twins grabbed Tamaki to dance with him. Mori hovered at the edge and just watched with a soft expression.

            “Well, for all the trouble this vacation has been,” said (Y/N), “At least we ended up having fun.”

            Kyoya paused and looked down at them. “Would you like to dance?”

            “I might go and join, yes,” said (Y/N).

            “I meant with me,” said Kyoya. He raised a hand.

            (Y/N) didn’t hesitate. They took it, and Kyoya led them to the dance floor. He put his other hand on their waist, and (Y/N) rested their second hand on his shoulder. To the music, they moved in tandem, and (Y/N) smiled at Kyoya. There was enough energy that they didn’t get caught just staring at one another, but it was hard to tear their eyes from one another. It was just so easy to be together.

            Kyoya’s mind kept flitting to their moment together at lunch, the quiet calm, the way their hand fit in his. Here they fit just as well, now in his arms. Kyoya didn’t want to let them go. He wanted to hold them forever. They trusted him. They cared for him beyond his money and status. They liked him for who he was and never judged. Kyoya loved them for it. Kyoya loved (Y/N).

            (Y/N) let Kyoya spin them and grinned. This was the perfect moment. Being with Kyoya was perfect. He cared about them and respected them. He saw their potential and never discouraged their efforts to build a better life for themself. He noticed the small things about them, what they liked and what they didn’t. And (Y/N) loved that about him. (Y/N) loved Kyoya.

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[reubyanne]

Dick just discover that his cool funny uncle supes is single, and his single since birth dad is getting cranky day by day. if the grown up won't do anything, then the kid is in action.

with the help of his friends that in relationships, and some little advice talk with Dinah, he decide to stepped in his dad's love life.

step one, get the cool uncle attention!

Kon: uh, are you sure about this dick? i mean, this is a 77 story building..

Dick: I've never been so sure in my whole life, kon! push me!

Kon: okay, here goes nothing.

Superman comes and save Dick, he flies him to the rooftop and meet Kon there.

Superman: okay, Superboy is here, and why you don't use your grappling, boy wonder? this is a 77 story building!

Yes, Dick get his attention. and yes, he and Kon get an hour long lecture.

step two, make his hopeless dad and the cool uncle to meet.

Dick bring Kon to the batcave, it's not his first time in there, heck, Kon is dating Tim. Dick basically his in law. and maybe that's why he allowed himself to get dragged here and there with Dick.

but, it's Kon's first time near the monitor. and by intel from agent A, Batman just arrived at the Manor.

Dick: quick! press this!

Kon: what will happen if i press that?! I don't want to get more lecture!

Dick: just believe me! do you want my blessing or not?!

Kon: right.

As soon as Kon pressed the emergency button that right directed to Superman, the batcave lift open. And Superman is already flying in a hurry and worry on his face.

Superman: Br-Batman! are you alright?! it's not like you to push emergency! are you bleeding? dying?

Batman: well, it its not me though.

he pointed to Dick and Kon that trying to running away.

Batman: Grayson, Kent.

Dick knew he fucked up when Batman call his real last name, and Kon feel it too.

Superman: oh it's you two again..

Batman: again? what do they did?

Superman: well, little bird right here trying to fly, from a 77 story building with no grappling, in Metropolis.

Batman: Grayson-Wayne, speak.

Okay, Batman is mixed his last name, it mean he doesn't that mad anymore.

Dick: well, i just.. want to get supes attention! and maybe, maaaybe.. i could.. help you two.. you know.. like Kon and Tim.

Kon: dude, stop dragged me in..!

Batman sigh, maybe this is the time.

Batman: Dick, me and clark.. already in a relationship.

not only Dick, Kon is also surprised.

Dick: w-what do you mean B? i.. I mean..!

Batman: Dick, I'm not a child, either is clark. and I'm not kind of person to do PDA and clark respect it.

Superman: i personally want to tell you boys in private but seems like i already got your approval huh, Dick?

Dick: but didn't you just got single?! did you dip that easy?!

Superman: wow, hold on there, chum.. me and Bruce has been best friend for years and years.. amd when my relationship is not working out, the only person i could think of as a home is.. Bruce.

Dick: that didn't explain anything but great to know! well, me and Kon have to go now, bye dads!

Batman: wait.

just before Dick and Kon could run away from the cave, Batman cold voice cutting their legs.

Batman: let's get back to the ".. like Tim and Kon" sentence.. are you dating my Robin, Kent?

Kon: *whisper* please tell Tim that i love him!

Dick: chill, my other dad is your brother, remember!!

Superman: *shielding them* wait there, B. what's wrong with Tim and Kon dating?

Batman: there's nothing wrong with it.

Superman: so why did you mad?

Batman: I'm not mad.

Dick: i see you sulking, B.

Kon: wow, you're not helping, dude!

Batman frowned,

Batman: you two better wash the batmobile, don't leave any crumbs or dust and wax it two layers. now.

Dick n Kon: aye aye!!

as Dick and Kon run for their life, Superman just chuckles.

Superman: i see you sulking, B. is that because you discover your kid in a relationship this way?

Batman: no.

Superman: i see you're calling Tim right now, B.

Batman: ... i have mission for his team.

Superman just laughed.

Superman: sure, sure.. wanna grab a dinner together later? in Metropolis, i pay.

Batman: ... ... ... as long as the place is clean and the food is good, i can dine in no fancy restaurant.

Superman: well, you should because I can't take your princess ass to eat caviar with my reporter salary. is 7 p.m doable for the Gotham's knight?

Batman: accepted.

Superman: what about your patrol?

Batman: *point to Dick and Kon that wiping batmobile shiny.* they can do.

[castleclerics]

will byers and selflessness, selfishness, and fear

too much will mischaracterization i'm seeing recently from both will haters and will lovers so let's get one thing clear: will is selfless at his core, he is a selfless person. however we do see him start to dwindle in that department in s3-4 in certain situations. HOWEVER that does not mean he cannot come back around, in fact it's inevitable that he does, and quite exactly—and i can’t stress this enough—EXACTLY where his strength will come from in s5.

first, the van scene. will is both selfless and selfish during it, sacrificing his own feelings so mike knows he's needed and so his and el's relationship can bloom. however, he is literally putting words in el's mouth (even if he assumes that these are things she genuinely feels since that’s what he feels for mike so it only makes since his gf does too, doesn't make it ok.) and using her as a shield, there is no way around either of these things.

next, will not standing up to el's bullies or for her is “selfish” in a way, especially since partly the reason he doesn’t is because he’s scared of being a target. especially with the classroom scene, they literally show the girl flirting with will and him rejecting her, reminding the audience of his sexuality right before the bullying starts, once again staying in the shadows, el being his shield.

(also btw, lucas doesn’t stand up for his dnd friends when jason becomes aggressive with him for the same reason, he wants to blend in and still not seem like a nerd. but obviously we see him by the end of the season accept who he truly is and stops running from himself.)

they show this three separate times. it’s not that will should’ve stood up for her all of those times, but more of the fact that he had three chances and took none of them. he could’ve stopped each time from progressing into something worse and didn’t, queueing the viewer into showing that this is something he has to change, and will. he knows the right thing to do, even cries for el, and doesn’t do it like he most likely would. even with the s1 bullies, the party who are all targets stick together and face the bullies as one. it's because will’s trauma has made him freeze like a deer in headlights in a crisis. then once the bullies leave two separate times he tells el “it wasn’t that bad.” also saying that he and el will fix her project together, instead of preventing the destruction from happening in the first place because of his own fears. (also yes he does walk outside literally as they’re destroying the project, but i think it was purposeful, bc he wouldn’t have stepped in anyway if he saw the whole situation from the start.)

there’s also room for nuance, (? if that’s the right word) he’s a 15 y/o kid, one who’s gay in the 80’s and we don’t even know the extent of his UD and pre-show trauma yet but we already know he has literally been through hell and back.

his trauma strips him of who actually is, that's what trauma literally is until you are able to face it. you can forget who you once were before it got its hands on you. i mean, we literally have this scene about fear starring will:

there’s a reason they give us three separate shots close up too of will looking at the el’s bullying situations go down, they are that of how he freezes when he feels the mindflayer. showing he chooses not to act because of his fear. will’s current character is completely driven by it. so is everyone else too, but will’s fear is one they have outwardly highlighted for the whole series as it builds, and it is more destructive to himself and others than almost anyone else in the show, the anyone else’s being the “villains” so to speak. however he will not fall into the trap, he will take responsibility and fix the messes he’s made. that’s literally **why** he takes center stage in s5.

they establish in s1-2 countless times that he can be selfless, and it actually comes very naturally to him, even before the show's events take place. why do you think they make sure to drill that into your head just before he leans into being a little selfish in certain ways? it's been reiterated by the duffers so many times that his coming of age is in s5 and that "this emotional arc for him is what we feel is going to hopefully tie the whole series together." so he obviously will be able to get back to that place. once he does and faces/accepts his trauma instead of freezing and hiding/lying and stands up for others AND HIMSELF and learns to love himself, he will finally come into the core of who he is again and better than ever. he is going to really have to push himself and that is what will make it so beautiful to watch unfold. he’ll being casting fireball once again instead of protection like he currently is.

i don't understand why all of this is rocket science to some people. it's almost like he's a complex character and his journey is far from over or something 😱😱 he’s also not a character that can “do no wrong” but his trauma makes it completely understandable but the show won’t excuse away his actions. he will utilize it in s5. we are on his journey with him seeing from his pov. there’s a reason they make you sympathize with him even during scenes where he may be more self-centered. it shows what is wrong with society instead of the characters themselves, bc isn’t that the true monster after all? at the end of the day he doesn’t mean to hurt anyone—even though he does, and definitely feels the guilt of it—he’s just absolutely horrified and hasn’t yet pushed himself to do the things he doesn’t want to, that he knows he has to.

(i think also noah does a beautiful job of reflecting this in will making himself smaller and very stiff while being in a more grown body in s4, you can literally see little will in all of his movements and mannerisms and it's so obviously incongruent with his bigger body. he also only moves his arms and legs so far out of his own bubble usually keeping them to his sides as much as possible, literally showing he’s stuck and hasn’t yet grown into his own.)

[revivefromtheashes]

We have seen what America really thinks about “traditional biblical teachings” and “Christian values” based on the response to Bishop Mariann Edgar Budde speaking truthfully, biblically, and faithfully about the love and mercy of God.

There’s a lot to unpack (politically and religiously) from the last few days. I have chosen to address two issues here: deportation and gender.

Ezekiel tells us that Sodom was destroyed due to her arrogance, gluttony, wastefulness, and being inhospitable to the stranger. [Side note: there is no mention of homosexuality as the reason for destruction.] Referencing Exodus and the story of Lot, the inhabitants of Sodom were inhospitable to two foreigners passing through their city. They were God’s angels. This was a test. They broke the “desert code of hospitality,” which is to give a stranger shelter, food, and safety when passing through your gates. This included potential enemies. Because of Sodom’s sins, God destroyed the city.

Philip was the first missionary and the first to be titled an “evangelist” in the Bible. He encountered an Ethiopian eunuch on the road to Gaza. God sent him there. [Side note: eunuchs in the Bible are neither fully male or fully female. They are outcasts in society and ostracized. Jesus speaks of them in Matthew, stating that some are born this way, some are made this way, and some choose to be this way. Meaning, some are literally born neither male nor female, some are made that way (like as punishment for a crime or because they’re showing they’re “loyal to the royals”), and some choose to be that way (like monks, priests, nuns, or celibacy, preference, health, etc.)]. The eunuch asks about scripture (reading a scroll of parts of the book of Isaiah) and what the writer means. Philip shares the good news of Jesus. The eunuch is saved. They travel the road together and come upon some water. The eunuch asks what is to keep him from being baptized right now? Philip says let’s go and baptizes the eunuch. When they come out of the water, Philip is suddenly raptured by God. The only time this occurs is when there is a higher purpose for the person or they have done so good they get a ticket to Heaven pronto (like with Elijah and his role in the End Times or Enoch because he pleased the Lord - other examples would be Paul, Jesus, etc.). Obviously, Philip did something right. [I would also like to add here that Christianity is the only monotheistic tradition that truly assigns gender to the divine. Judaism and Islam view God as genderless and regard assigning trivial human attributes like gender to God as a sin.] It’s about loving them like God does. Period. An important note here is that the eunuch changed nothing. They were authentically themselves, and they were accepted and received salvation just as any other. Philip didn’t ask questions, he didn’t judge, he didn’t take exception, he didn’t make excuses, he just said yes, you too! This is what Christianity is supposed to look like!

Bishop Budde preached and prayed from the Bible. Everything she pleaded for can be supported by scripture. If you want those verses message me. She spoke Jesus’ words to 47. If any Christian has a problem with that or doesn’t side with Christ then there seems to be a conflict between true faith and bad politics.

Additionally, for 25 years Matthew Shepard had no permanent resting place due to concerns his grave would be vandalized. Reverend Budde learned of this and invited the Shepards to inter him inside the Washington National Cathedral. She co-officiated the service which stated Matthew was now and forever home in the church where he was loved.

I’m not looking to fight. I’m stating facts and where I’m at. If this isn’t where you’re at, either get there with me or see yourself off my page! I’m so exhausted by the hate and the justification of it. There’s no place for it here!

Will you care when it’s me they’re after?

[cybershock24601]

A woman who openly dislikes you also being basically the only person who speaks up from you is absolutely brain breaking. Especially bc with Illario it's like, it would be easy to fit in his worldview if she was a conquest or in some way attracted to him or something but she is very much not. Everything about their relationship suggests that the best behavior he can expect from her towards him is bare minimum civility and that is shown in most aspects of their interactions so what's it mean that "bare minimum civility" is treating him better than most of the people in his life.

Rook and Illario's relationship is insane to me because as I've said before my Rook was the one who advised Lucanis to lock Illario up for what at the end of the day were political reasons and absolutely gives him shit when he deserves it but is also the only person in Villa Dellamorte to really have Illario's back in a lot of ways.

Lucanis and Illario's relationship is so defined by Caterina's treatment and abuse of them that Lucanis is never going to be able to speak up for Illario when he can't even speak up for himself and I can see a young child who sees the safety in being the favorite not really wanting to risk losing that favor by stepping out of line and also starts to subconsciously rationalize and internalize Illario's harsh treatment from Caterina as Illario just not being as good as Lucanis. So much of Lucanis and Illario's dynamic was solidified as children and as neither one of them really had anyone close to them aside from each other there was never anything to really shake up their dynamic or cause them to really question it because that's just the way things are.

Enter Rook, especially a Rook who is not a Crow, who through their relationship with Lucanis is drawn into the family and gets to have a real good look at what the fuck is wrong with House Dellamorte. Rook's probably really quick to pick up on how Illario is treated in the family and sure Rook is pissed at him for what he's done to Lucanis and thinks he's an absolute idiot for working with the Venatori like he did, they still extend Illario empathy and some basic human decency which is so much more then Illario is used to.

Sure Illario can be an idiot sometimes but that doesn't make the way Illario is treated by his family right. I also think Rook - or that very least my Rook who has some similar issues of acting like a fool to keep people's expectations low so as to not to disappoint them when she can't live up to said expectations - starts to see through the mask of the carefree philanderer Illario wears and how much of his behavior stems from just playing into the low expectations everyone has of him. Rook, who is generally a pretty kind and empathetic person, would take it upon themselves to start calling out Caterina and Lucanis when they're being overly dismissive of Illario both as a person and an assassin because their behavior towards him can be really uncalled for a lot of the time and that just isn't right and Rook is definitely starting to get why things played out the way they did between Illario and Lucanis. Not that Rook is giving Illario a pass at all but Rook can acknowledge that Illario's actions did not come out of nowhere.

Illario who has grown up never expecting anyone to have his back is floored. Yes, Illario could trust that Lucanis would always back him up on a job but Lucanis would never really intercede on his behalf with Caterina, or at least if Lucanis ever did that was an impulse that was killed long ago probably due to Caterina's cane. So the fact that Rook who clearly isn't a fan of him is speaking up to her is mind blowing and Illario cannot make heads or tails of why Rook would do that. Not just talk back to Caterina because Rook has likely been speaking up for Lucanis' sake already which is an insane thing to do in the first place, but the fact that Rook is willing to do so for Illario just doesn't make any sense no matter how Illario looks at it because Rook just being a kind person is not a motive Illario is capable of considering. Illario spends a lot of late nights puzzling over what 5D chess game Rook is playing and what she must want to be doing all this.

Rook calling out Lucanis is also something that would stump Illario because it is clear Rook is head over heels for Lucanis so why would she potentially cause friction in her own relationship just for Illario's sake. Even stranger is that after several late night conversations behind closed doors between Rook and Lucanis, Lucanis' behavior towards Illario starts to change. It really freaks Illario out because why the fuck is Lucanis being so nice to him, is he dying??? Illario would wonder if he was possessed but he knows Lucanis is and the demon hates Illario's guts so what is going on?? It would probably take Lucanis and Illario some time to find a good equilibrium in their relationship as they start reconciling and unpacking the hurts in their past that lead to everything that happened because what Illario did was wrong and he knows that by now but it's nice to have Lucanis acknowledge just how much constantly being sidelined and considered second best hurt.

I think the real turning point in their relationship would be that the first time Lucanis stands up to Caterina is for Illario's sake. Illario had thought that if anything would get Lucanis to talk back to Caterina it would be Rook so the fact that the first person Lucanis really took an actual stand against Caterina for was Illario is inconceivable to him considering how the entirety of their lives have played out. It also brings up some lingering bitterness with no real target that Lucanis couldn't have done this before everything that happened between them and told Caterina that he didn't want to be First Talon. Things are still complicated between those boys and they always will be but they are getting better and it's pretty clear that Rook was the instigator for a lot of it.

[itsahotminuteinbetween]

together.

days 19 + 20 of dcatober: Ruin and Trapped

[acesammy]

The thing about how sam’s arc in season 4 is often discussed is that people simultaneously acknowledge that the angels are bad, while claiming Sam is an idiot for rebelling against them.

like I have listened through three (3) rewatch podcasts and they always seem to fall into this loop of going ‘hey the angels are Obviously up to no good’ while also going ‘Sam is really stupid. Why would he trust a demon when literal angels are telling him to stop’

idk man. Maybe bc the angels are Obviously up to no good????

[unforth]

Since I've seen several posts floating around that try to rebut the points of @end-otw-racism by saying that AO3 is too big to moderate, can we PLEASE take a moment and remember that AO3 IS ALREADY HEAVILY MODERATED.

We all know the obvious one - that if you post anything about monetizing fic, you will be moderated into oblivion. We also all know why! This is essential to AO3's survival as a non-profit! No one would propose changing this!

But a lot of people seem to forget that AO3 is moderated in other ways! For a personal example, several years ago I got a "change this or we're removing your work" e-mail. The work in question? A collection of pseudo-ficlets that were somewhere between outlines and sketchy fics. What I got moderated for? I said in the a/n that if anyone wanted to expand my kinda-outliney nonsense into fully fleshed out stories, they were welcome to do so! I was told this was a violation of the ToS, because fics that are collections of prompts aren't allowed, and that if I didn't change the a/n I'd have to delete the work. Of course I edited the a/n, and my work was allowed, and I moved on. I did, immediately, delete another work I'd posted, which WAS literally sets of prompts I'd written free to a good home. It was clearly in violation of those rules, and I just hadn't realized content like that wasn't allowed.

Numerous things are forbidden on AO3 and will get moderated and potentially deleted, including:

advertising

"find a fic" posts

spam

plagiarized works

virus spreading

doxxing

actual CSAM

lots of other stuff as listed in the tos

If the foundation of your argument is "AO3 is too big to moderate" your argument is bad. AO3 is already moderated.

So that means your ACTUAL argument is "I think AO3 is moderated enough as-is and I don't think AO3 should be moderated in a way that might better protect fans of color."

Having that attitude despite the many, many, MANY fans of colors who say "hey, we don't feel safe here, can this be better moderated to protect us?" (when, by the way, the existing harassment policy SHOULD protect them but clearly isn't being implemented in ways that actually DOES protect them!)

Well. That's sure a take.

(TO BE CLEAR: I am anti-censorship. I am pro-moderation. I am pro-AO3. I fucking love your dark fic, your underage works, your non-con stories, your kinky pwp with "no redeeming qualities," your dirty-wrong-bad ego fics. I would NEVER want a solution that removed that content. And I believe AO3 is the greatest thing to happen to fic in my lifetime and I want it to continue to be the wonderful thing it is. I think that what AO3 already is can be reconciled with the demands of fans of color that they be better protected. I believe fans of color when they say that the current policies don't protect them adequately, that they don't feel safe, that this drives them out of white western fandom. I've listened a lot, and I've seen a lot, and I've learned a lot, and I want AO3 to be better than it is in this regard. I'm honestly kinda depressed how many people seem comfortable with the status quo.)

[hi-i-just]

Orion is 'selfish' (<- using this very loosely, he's more insensitive more than anything) in the sense he gets so taken by the bigger picture he doesn't really occur to him to consider how it affects the smaller people in his method — mostly D-16, who is the person closest to him.

D-16's outburst in the cave is part-projection, but it's partly true too. "But it doesn't matter what I want, right Pax?" is not a statement that comes out of nowhere; that's how D-16 feels whenever Orion goes off in another 'run' for the greater good for everybody. Yes, Orion wants what would benefit for everyone else — what he fails to do is to respect other people's wants and choices. That was the flaw Orion had to learn from.

Because turns out? Yeah, he did suck at respecting D's wants and choices. Tricking him to joining the race was just the most egregious example. D has already made it EXPLICITLY clear he doesn't wanna go on the race, all with his own valid and understandable reasons, what does Orion do? Had him go on the race anyway.

"But it ended being beneficial/it was for the greater good!" You could say the same for life-saving surgery, but even then doctors have to respect your decision if you choose not to go through it.

"But D ended up enjoying it in the end even if he said no at first!" if you say something like that about your partner if you had sex that counts as rape. (And extreme example, but I want to be very clear about the importance of consent here).

Consent is no small thing. Respecting it is respecting the individual and acknowledging their autonomy. My sister does not like to be hugged most of the time — there's no 'grand' reason to it, it doesn't harm her, it doesn't even distress her, it's straight up just a hug — she just doesn't like it. Do I still hug her anyway? NO. Because she said NO. Simple as that. And that's just a mundane and trivial example. What Orion did was worse.

Yes, he meant well, but even after D listed his reasons why he doesn't wanna join the race (he can't transform, might get humiliated/demoted, injured/killed even! ALL super reasonable and more than valid), ORION STILL TRICKED HIM TO JOIN THE RACE. I don't think people even realize just how unimaginably shitty it was for Orion to do. I do think a lot of people end up justifying what Orion did because "he's Optimus Prime, he does what's good!" when the scene makes it obvious he's doing something pretty shitty. It gets buried under the humor of the racing scene, shit I laughed too, but when I saw Orion latched the jetpack unto D I was PISSED. And that anger and irritation remained even long after that scene ended.

The worst part? Is that it's likely this isn't the only time Orion did something like this — it's just the one we get to see most recently. It's 50 cycles of your well-meaning friend not respecting you and your choices and your reasons.

"Then why didn't D speak up then??" Why the FUCK did it need for D to speak up to Orion for Orion to realize that not respecting people's consent is shitty?? 💀 When respecting people's consent is supposed to be the default. That aside, what I do appreciate about Orion, is that when people call him out, he does change! He does acknowledge that D's criticism, while overblown and mixed with projection, had some nick of truth in it, and changed.

The Orion that made those speech with the miners, asking them for help and letting them choose instead of telling them to follow him and fight? The Orion in the beginning of the movie would not be able to do that. D's outburst, hurtful as it is, was necessary and humbling. It was a wake-up call to the one thing missing that what makes Orion Pax become Optimus Prime — respecting people's freedom to choose.

I'm going to do a better analysis but I'm surprised that many label Orion Pax as bad selfish for being a rebel.

Let's recap: they lived in a system that treated them like garbage "because of how they were born" where you had to submit and even suffer physical and verbal abuse.unable to defend himself

Even all this atmosphere affects jazz

d16 justifies the mistreatment she received, Elita calls herself a mistake with legs, they even belittle the life of miners because it is protocol, if it weren't for Orion and d16, Jazz would be dead.

That many say it is selfish is an erroneous term because remember Orion's actions are driven by the fact that they want a better life for everyone outside of that abuse.

His actions are reckless more than anything

I'm not saying he's a saint because he's not, but many of his actions have some justification, but then I'll do a better analysis.

[dennisboobs]

i think everyone on sunnytwt needs to be sat down so i can explain to them what basic human empathy is. and then maybe i put them in a blender until they agree to write meta about the characters instead of whether or not charlie day got facial reconstruction surgery.